


The Pipeweed Incident

by Andreri25



Category: The Lord of the Rings - All Media Types
Genre: But the poor thing didn't know!, Elf Biology, Everyone Is Gay, Gen, Gimli is a bit of an arse, M/M, Multi, Poisoning, Whump, the fellowship finds out about
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-06-25
Updated: 2017-06-25
Packaged: 2018-11-18 17:44:51
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,125
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11295600
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Andreri25/pseuds/Andreri25
Summary: In which Gimli unknowingly attempts murder and the fellowship gets a lesson on elf toxicology through Legolas' poisoning. FOTR. Either general or Legolas/the whole fellowship.





	The Pipeweed Incident

**Author's Note:**

> A/N: I most warm you, English is not my first language so there will be mistakes, and the POV changes constantly. No slash unless you squirm really hard and even so it would be Legolas/literally the whole fellowship. This gave me LegolasxBoromir feels though.

Nearly a week had passed after the fellowship’s departing from Rivendell, and to say that they were yet to get accustomed to one another was an understatement.

“Oi! Be careful you wazzock” Gimli bristled glaring at the arrow embedded into the tree trunk less than an inch away from his nose.

“Stray arrow” Legolas’ grin was obvious in his voice even as he twirled away from the dwarf and shoot another arrow in one fluid motion, successfully hitting a rabbit ten yards afar.

“You are behaving like an elfling, Mellon-nin” Tiredly, Aragorn went to retrieve the dead animal, handing the arrow back its owner “I think this will suffice for dinner” promptly he flung the hunt over his shoulder with the others and made way for their camping hideout.

“More like breakfast” protested Gimli, throwing a dirty glance both at the increasing light on the sky above and at the elf rearing them.

They were all worn out after walking almost twelve hours straight, with little to no pause for rest and meals. The openness of the valley they were journeying through had kept them walking until sunrise, when Aragorn had made a sharp turn left and guided them to a secluded section of trees about a mile wide. In the center, two huge rocks leaned against each other in a makeshift cave served them as refuge for the daytime. 

The Ranger went directly inside to help Sam prepare their meal, while Legolas knelt by the near pond to fill his waterskin.

With how little he ate and the amount of water he drank, the elf held a humorous resemblance to a plant in Gimli’s mind and he didn’t hesitate in stating so in a satire way.

“Well, you too remind me of nature, but I would never compare a lady with a horse’s behind” the smugness in his voice rose as he towered over the dwarf.

“Look who is talking you little effeminate airhead”

“At the very least you have elf women to parallel me too, which is more than can be said of dwarves”

“That is enough of you both” Gandalf’s angry voice trumped as his head emerged from their cave “the sun is already too high, we must shield ourselves from unwanted eyes, there certainly is no reason for us to be hear as well. Come quickly!”

The blond walked past with a blank expression, and Gimli swore under his breath before following, already thinking of ways to get him back from the arrow and the insults.

* * *

 

After everyone had partaken in the stew Sam had managed to make with their hunt, they sat around the cave just talking for a while. But heavy eyelids and jerking heads had them setting the watches and finally laying down for some well-deserved rest.

Legolas as usual had offered to take the first and last watches, but Gimli had protested about not wanting to be interrupted in his sleep and claimed the last turn for himself.

Now the sun was low in the horizon, close to sunset, and Gimli glanced around their camp: over the huddled forms of the hobbits; Boromir, Aragorn and Gandalf facing away from him in their bedrolls, and lastly Legolas sitting with his back against one of the stone walls, head tilted toward his shoulder and eyes staring unseeingly straight ahead. Most of the fellowship had been uneasy when they first learned that the elf slept with his eyes wide open, specially the hobbits Merry and Pippin with a bit of a screaming episode, but now it was almost normal. Almost.

Soon everyone would wake up, if he was to act it had to be now. Gimli laid his axe down and reached for the small pouch that he kept in his bag before furtively making his way to the sleeping elf. He had noticed Legolas distancing himself from the group each time they got their pipes out to smoke, but unlike Boromir who simply didn’t like to and still tolerated them, the look of sheer disgust on the elf’s face was always clear as crystal. His fingers worked fast in finding Legolas’ waterskin in the growing darkness of their cave, dropping in a few leaves from the pouch. His pulse beating in his ears with the thrill of getting caught until he was back sitting in his post, a smirk tugging at his lips, _“That should teach him”._

Aragorn sat up and Legolas stirred and blinked back into awareness.

Once they’ve taken a small breakfast of fruit and some bread they packed up and set off immediately, dipping into the dark lands. Gandalf, Aragorn and Frodo lead their path, Merry, Pippin and Boromir after them, at the rear Sam and Bill the pony walked between Gimli and Legolas, who was last. After about an hour of walking the dwarf caught a glimpse of the archer taking a long deep sip from his water in the starlit night, and quickly turned away biting the inside of his cheek to keep from laughing, watching in anticipation for the elf’s reaction out of the corner of his eye.

The bitter taste hit Legolas as soon as the water passed his throat and he spluttered. Sam threw him a worried look and that accursed dwarf guffawed “Sabotaging my water?” he hoarsely cleared his throat, “You grow –cough– more childish –cough– with each…-" he couldn’t continue for a painful coughing fit breached through his body, the blond reached a hand to his neck as his airway tightened and his breath didn’t quite reach his lungs, all the sudden he felt light headed and weak, fright was fastly clouding his mind.

“Strider!” came Sam’s aghast shout “help!”

Both Boromir and Aragorn were there in an instant, weapons in hand, the rest of the fellowship suit behind whereas Legolas tumbled onto his knees. The Ranger dropped his sword and plunged hastily to his friend, taking in his wide terrified eyes as strangled sounds escaped his slightly blue parted lips “What happened?’’

“He said something about his water” piped Sam.

Legolas shook with violent spasms while Aragorn tore the hand clutching his neck, the skin under it was rashed and obviously swollen.

“This only has pipeweed in it” spat Boromir, along with the sip he had taken from the elf’s waterskin, coming from behind them and seizing Legolas shoulders in an attempt to ease the jerking.

The rest of the fellowship observed in perturbed silence at the three kneeling men as Aragorn, quick as lightning, shoved his hand deep into the elf’s mount. At once Legolas bent over empting his stomach on the grass.

The heir of Gondor didn’t waste a second “Any of you get me dandelion, ground ivy and stinging nettle” the blond’s eyes slipped closed and he would have fallen on his face if not for the strong arms pushing him back against Boromir’s broad chest “Hurry! And get athelas from my bag and some garlic too”

Sam and Merry raced past the group to seek the herbs, Frodo assaulting the provisions that Bill carried and Pippin running through the ranger’s bag. Gimli just stood frozen on the spot staring at the scene in front of him with a dumbfounded expression.

The two men laid Legolas on his back, head nested on Boromir’s lap as Aragorn tugged open the former’s tunic neck and began to firmly but gently massage his swollen throat, taking note on the already fair elf’s paleness and his cold, sweat covered skin “Gandalf, get a fire started”

“We are too exposed” argued half-heartedly the wizard.

“He is right, lad” spoke Gimli for the first time.

Aragorn was absolutely rabid “Be silent! Don’t think that I don’t know how that accursed pipeweed came to him!” his hands bawled into tight fists “I know you’ve had your disagreements but I didn’t think you would actually go as far as to poison him”

“Of course not! You think I meant for this to happen? I would never harm one of my companions intentionally!”

“Aragorn!” Boromir called in distress “He’s stopped breathing”

Frantic fingers searched for a pulse and found it, albeit weak and rapid, the ranger placed his hands one above the other over Legolas breastbone “When I tell you, pinch his nose and blow air in his mouth” he gestured wildly to the others as he started pounding rhythmically on the elf’s chest “And by the Valar, lit a fire and boil the herbs!”

Gandalf said no more. He collected some dry grass and it caught fire after a quiet whisper, they put a pot with water to it right in time with the other two hobbits’ return with their herbs, all the ingredients were dropped in. Another low unintelligible word from Gandalf and it was boiling.

Boromir dropped his head and covered Legolas mouth with his own, forcefully blowing air into the constricted lungs when Aragorn signaled him. Nothing happened. The ranger started again, this time pressing down harder. Signal, blow, again no change. The other five companions watched in growing horror at the stillness of their comrade, fair features so white and glistening with sweat. Merry covered his mouth with a hand as tears prickled at his eyes, Pippin was clinging to Frodo and hiding his face on the older’s shoulder, Gimli looked like he was going to be sick.

By the fourth time they repeated the process, Legolas gasped and his eyelids fluttered for a second before closing again but he kept breathing, through an awful sounding wheeze but he kept breathing.

Everyone released the air they had been holding in relief, Aragorn once more resumed massaging the elf’s swelled and reddened throat “The broil?”

 Sam quickly poured some into a cup and handed it to him.

Gandalf tried again “We are still bare beneath the skies, Aragorn”

He carefully raised the archer’s head and pressing the cup to his lips stated “He cannot travel any further tonight” a few sips downed, Legolas coughed and Aragorn retreated the cup, he seemed satisfied with the amount drank as he didn’t bring it back. “He needs rest and being watched over, at least for tonight and the morrow”

The wizard was going to speak again when Frodo interrupted “I agree, and he shall have it. But the fact remains that staying here in the open would do no good to anyone”

They argued over it for a little while but Frodo as Ring bearer had the ultimate vote and finally decided on carrying on forwards, so they wrapped Legolas’ freezing form in blankets, placed him on Boromir’s arms and took off in heavy silence.

Gimli tried to speak to Aragorn, but all he got was a brisk growl and a “He’s not out of danger yet”. After a few anguish hours of walking restlessly they found a den carved into the back of a hill that was (gladly) big enough for all of them and set camp.

Pippin replaced the gondorian in pillowing Legolas’ head in his tights and was now softly petting the light blond hair “I still don’t understand what happened” he sighed.

The dunedan simply took Legolas’ waterskin and emptied it’s contends for everyone to see.

“But how come...?” began Sam.

“I…” Gimli cleared his throat “I swear upon that which is most sacred to any dwarf that it was not my intention to put his life in danger” his voice constricted “It was merely a prank to distaste him, I didn’t want to …I thought he simply did not like the smell or taste of pipeweed…I did not know that he would…”

“Choke to death?” Pain flared in the dwarf’s face “Now you know. But he may not wake up so, what does it matter? I hope you’re content by your little quarrel’s outcome” Aragorn stared in dark satisfaction as a sob was held back by the redhead.

“What do you mean he may not wake up, Strider?” Merry’s panic flew in the small space like a spark “He’s an elf!”

“Aye, but that does not make him invincible, and that which he drank is extremely poisonous to his kin” It was Gandalf who answered with a pained glance at the young elf prince “He may yet suffer another episode in the next hours. We can only hope”

They’d taken turns watching over Legolas during the night with little to no change to his condition, but come morning and given that they wouldn’t be moving during the day most had decided to sleep in and everything was quiet. Aragorn had not slept but a few hours, not wanting to leave his friend’s side in his precarious state regardless how many times his comrades insisted. He didn’t even realize that he had been napping again until his sharp senses caught a soft sound besides him, the elf’s eyes were open and clear with consciousness for the first time but soft desperate gasps escaped from his lips. The Ranger quickly reached over and took a fair hand in his, squishing lightly “Mellon, is alright. I’m here. Can you try and take deep breaths?” he did as he was told and though his breath still came ragged and uneven the air seemed to be getting to his lungs now. Legolas tried to call for him but couldn’t go beyond the A in his name and instead settled for putting a hand to his neck.

The cup with the medicinal brew was next to them, so Aragorn grabbed it and held it to his friend’s lips “I need you to drink this” the hurt in those blue eyes was enough to break his hearth “It would help with the pain”.

Resigned, the archer pushed himself to get into a sitting position frowning when he barely managed to raise his head a little and even so shaking with effort. The man by his side put a hand beneath his shoulder blades and held him up just enough to drink. Swallowing felt like daggers down his bruised throat and he couldn’t go beyond half the liquid, anger flared inside of him for how weak he felt. Suddenly a curly haired head popped into his line of view and Pippin’s voice chirped in “He’s awake!”, his companion’s joy warmed his heart and the elf gathered his strength to give him a sleepy smile.

“Aye, but he still needs to heal and will be sleep again soon, so there’s no need to wake the others, alright Master Peregrine?” The rest of the conversation was lost to him as their faces blurred and was forcefully swiped away into elven dreams.

The next time Legolas knew of the world around him, the light from the outside told him it was well past noon. With a slight jump he noticed a hand that was upon his brow and the deep blue eyes staring down at him earnestly. “Easy, friend” Frodo’s voice was full of worry “You still have a bit of a fever”

“I’m fine” his answer came out hoarse and the elf grimaced at the pain it brought to speak.

“Uh hum” the sarcasm was palpable “You must be starving, Sam made some of his famous onion soup especially for you” the hobbit then proceeded to help him into a sitting position against the elf’s assurance that he could do it himself, _he did feel better!_ Or so he thought until his head was held upright and the soil was suddenly upwards for a few moments before slowly going back down where it belonged.

Looking around still slightly dazed he saw that everyone was watching him with attention except for the gardener, who was serving a bowl of steaming soup that smelled delicious, but the thought of swallowing had him frowning lightly.

The hobbit seemed to get a glimpse of this for he ducked his head lower and muttered “It’s hardly a soup and certainly not one of my best works, I’m sure it doesn’t even come near as good as anything the elves make”

Legolas, not wanting to down the kind Sam quickly countered “Smells great” but his voice broke at the last syllable and he once more clutched his throat, wincing.

“Are…are you in pain?” a voice mumbled.

For the first time Legolas addressed the dwarf, who stood far from the others looking consternate. The archer’s eyes glowered for a second with unrestrained anger and then went cold, void of all emotion and Gimli thought that to be much more frightening, not being able to hold the blue stare he was receiving for long he inspected the ground at his feet scratching his head awkwardly. They couldn’t be expecting an apology in front of everyone. _Apparently they are,_ he corrected himself has Merry cleared his throat loudly and called the redhead’s name sternly. He struggled with the words for what felt like an eternity before finally growling and proudly erecting his spine to his full height, returning the intensity of the elf’s glare “I’ve come to realize that our feud this past days is highly immature and unbefitting of both our races, which is why I am offering you a truce, to cease all hostile actions between us” he grunted and finished in a small voice “Also, I never meant to cause you injury nor illness, and I admit shame of my actions” then, in typical dwarven fashion, Gimli did a low bow over his folded arm.

Legolas stayed skeptical a little longer, but he had heard honesty in the other’s voice, so with the corners of his mouth barely curling up he answered in the manners of his own people, taking a hand to his breast then extending it gracefully towards the dwarf while bowing his head, accepting the peace.

“Great!” Pippin clapped his hands loudly “Now that’s dealt with, I heard something about soup?”

“It’s not for you, cousin Pippin!”

“But you heard him, his throat’s sore, he won’t eat all of it”

As the dispute developed, Sam drew closer to Legolas, a steaming bowl in his hands which he received gratefully and without hesitation took a sip bravely swallowing before his judgment convinced him otherwise. It felt like rock balls lit on fire with an aftertaste suspiciously close to his own blood, but none the less he smile and nodded at Sam to reassure him of the quality of his cooking. The hobbit’s face brightened up immediately, and all was well once more.

* * *

 

Legolas was up and good to go by nightfall, the incident completely behind them thanks to the elves fast healing, and so the Fellowship continued their journey on the quest to destroy the One. And if anyone knew something about the mysterious disappearance of Gimli’s pipe after that, none said anything. He had poisoned their elf, after all.


End file.
